I need help. My two cats - brother and sister who I have had for 6 years and who until this past Sunday were the best of friends have begun viciously fighting and I have had to keep them seperated for the past 3 days.   There has recently been a stray cat outside of our house and the vet seems to think this could have caused this.  But I have not seen then cat for 3 days and they are still fighting.  The female just growls at the male and he attacks her - he won't just leave her alone. I just purchased the feline diffuser thing hoping to help calm them.  Is this normal?  What else can I do?  I ma extremely stressed out over this - I can't imagine having to keep them seperated forever.

Please help!!!!!

Hi Stacey, I can relate to your problem. I have a male and female both 3 yrs old who were best buds. One day the male got territorial with the female, started attacking her and chasing her. Then to add to the problem, I adopted a stray older male (vet thinks he's about 12 yrs old) who is aggressive to the other two cats. I've used Feliway and some Bach Flower remedies, which have helped. But the behavior still flares up. The vet said it can take up to 6 months for the cats to work out their social interactions, and it's been 6 months.

Is there anything besides separating the kitties that you can do to calm the aggresseive behavior?

Hi, this is unfortunatey a fairly common scenario, even between siblings and best friends; it is called "redirected aggression." Separation is necessary, but does not need to be permanent. The best thing to do is treat the situation as if you were introducing cats who did not know each other. You want to create positive associations among them, and this takes a little time. They will not necessarily "work it out" themseves; you need to take action and guide them. Patience, play therapy, and flower essences can all be very helpful the process. Here is a great article written by my friend Jackson Galaxy about a similar situation, and how the problem was resolved: Redirected Aggression: A Case Study